


a triple; not a curtain call

by bigpappamg



Category: High School Musical (Movies)
Genre: M/M, One-Shot, confusing borderline chaotic writing to fit that confused chaotic closeted-jock mind, don't you just love that eventual chyan, eventual chad/ryan, one-sided chad/troy, why does everything i write look like failed attempts at poetry
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-05-23
Updated: 2015-05-23
Packaged: 2018-03-31 19:59:14
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,334
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3990844
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/bigpappamg/pseuds/bigpappamg
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>And it’s not that Chad doesn’t wanna kiss him, everyday after practice, against one of the worn out lockers. It’s just that he doesn’t. He can’t.</p>
            </blockquote>





	a triple; not a curtain call

**Author's Note:**

> Turns out marathoning all High School Musical films worked to, not only re-discover my childhood, crazed fangirl obsession but to dig out this ground moving love I have for Chyan, who by the way, is the ship we've always wanted and do not deserve.   
> And by we, I'm looking at you, Disney and your last-minute-decision-to-make-Ryan-look-straight. The mere fact that this fanfic exists is proof that you failed, but nice try.   
> I don't own HSM, because if I did, that blooper reel scene with Lucas jumping Chris would have totally happened, except with Corbin on that seat instead.

If it’s one thing he likes about basketball, it’s the lack of thinking it requires. It’s physical – action and reaction, muscle memory, in-the-moment, immediate response. It’s precisely the type of activity he needs – one that doesn’t require thinking. Because thinking, or _over-thinking_ , as Chad likes to call it, is too complicated and far too present in his everyday life when out of the court. When that ball’s being thrown around, when it’s fitting into the hoops like the exact, flawless science he’s never appreciated in math, it’s because he chose to have it happen. _He_ , his team, _his partners_. There’s a balance and a control over every move, control he only finds in basketball, and only then – and above all, control he seems to have no grasp of whatsoever when his brain is in the question.

The never-to-be-said-out-loud truth is that the extension of Chad’s denial pretty much only covers the people he’s surrounded by. They’re the ones who don’t know, have no suspicion. He, on the other hand, is pretty aware of the fact that the very reason his relationship with Taylor wasn’t working so much on his side, is due to him not being interested in girls at all, no matter how insanely brilliant and drop-dead gorgeous one of them can be, which is the exact case with Taylor. Who, if you asked him, is just his type, except not one bit and she deserves far better.

Because Chad is so going to admit to that. Right.

It’s almost sad, how not even Troy knows or even possesses an inkling towards the idea but then again, Troy’s got a heart of gold, but certainly not the sharpest brain in East High, not that Chad has any right to speak on that – and Troy is so definitely the one person Chad is _Chad_ around, which is even sadder, considering they are best friends, they’ve grown together and if anyone should know about this, it’s Troy, except…

Except he’s the one who can’t. Above all else. Him.

His job of pretending had been much easier back then, though, when every tiny piece fit perfectly into every tiny circle, triangle and square that the high school status-quo required to be built and it had been better, he hates to think it, but as much as he thinks Gabriella is a sweet girl, with a heart to match Troy’s and fuck if they aren’t the soulmates Chad has been rolling his eyes at the mere idea of because if soulmates are real, then Troy isn’t straight and Troy is straight and he’s with Gabriella and –

The status-quo is shattered, just like his heart and soon, his sanity.

Because it’s not so easy pretending when math nerds are dancing on tables and that weird ass kid speaks up about playing the cello instead of smoking weed like one would expect and Zeke bakes, what the hell? It’s so hard pretending when half of himself wants to lie and say that if a jock can make pretty little pink cakes, then he can be gay and the other half knows that’s bullshit because it’s different, it’s so different, it’s too different and it’s not that Chad doesn’t love being Troy’s best bud, even though Troy’s time has been way less about him and way more about _her_ , and it’s not that Chad doesn’t wanna kiss him, everyday after practice, against one of the worn out lockers. It’s just that he doesn’t. He can’t.

It’s easier playing basketball and making loud, obnoxious jokes in class and wrapping his arm around Taylor, leaning down and whispering something dirty he knows she’s gonna elbow him for, it’s easier; staring Ryan down, condescendingly, like he’s mentally mocking the sparkly hats and tight pants when really, he’s thinking he’s never found Ryan so attractive until this very moment, here, with everyone around and Ryan’s hand on top of his on a bat that insists, invites him, to swing.

It’s easier pretending, under the eyes of people who don’t know a thing. It’s harder, under those of someone who’s, not only seen enough of pretending, but does it on stage every night.

He kisses Ryan after dance lessons one evening, when he’s tired of pretending and runs off when his reasoning skills come back, avoiding him like the plague.

He leaves graduation before they can call his name – he’s heard Troy’s and what came after and that had been enough. They’re gonna say goodbye at some point, and it’ll be final, but Chad’s a professional procrastinator for things other than homework and basketball is easier than this, so that’s where he finds shelter in.

Troy goes after him, of course. It doesn’t mean anything, he’s still leaving and that's just one more way to tell Chad he's not enough but his insides turn, anyway, just a bit, just the necessary amount at the gesture and he swallows the words in his throat once Troy’s spoken and settles for a watery: Game on.

He buries his feelings deep under the ground, which is hard, but becomes a Redhawk and that’s easy. He grows up, which is hard but experience pats him on the back and rewards him with lessons just as much as it kicks him in the shin time after time and he matures – takes awhile, takes effort, takes getting used to but it happens, eventually. And seeing Troy play in an opposing team becomes not easy, but _easier_ , as does getting looks from people here and there in the streets when the blue-eyed hottie his roommate hooked him up with this week intertwines their fingers together. He gets over Troy, for the most part, which is definitely not easy and a part of him will always love him, but now it’s more like the brotherly affection he’s never been able to feel than the painful unrequited love he’s been forced to deal with for half of his life – now he smiles at seeing him and Gabriella together, smiles a genuine one, ‘cause Troy is, no matter what, his best friend and the biggest gift she’s giving him, whether it be knowingly or not, is to make him happy.

He also tells Troy about the, you know. Baking.

He’s glad to say it’s not as hard as he imagined it would be.

Chad _also_ visits Julliard on a Saturday night, (his pleading – not begging, he doesn’t beg – with Sharpay worked, who would have thought) and greets Ryan with a bouquet of red roses, a box of hat-shaped chocolates (thanks, Zeke) and a sheet of scribbled on piece of paper Kelsi was ever so kind to give him two weeks earlier (there’s nothing more charming than a man who’ll serenade you, especially one who claims to be 100% anti-anything-singing-or-dancing-related) and it’s greatly satisfying how the blonde’s ocean for eyes widen and his cheeks redden. It means he appreciates that Chad is trying and more importantly, means he's letting him. 

They kiss on the second date. Make out on the third and make love on the tenth. Chad waits at least four years before proposing, because he’s gotta make sure Ryan won’t tire of him (though honestly, despite the occasional bickering, their relationship seems to be in constant, eternal honeymoon phase – Sharpay barfs somewhere in Paris) and that his agent will find him a spot on a team that spends more time in New York, which she does, because she’s absolutely awesome (just not more than Taylor, who, has he mentioned, won a Nobel prize? Not that anyone was really surprised, it was bound to happen but still, _goddamn_ ) and doesn’t cry when Ryan says yes and wraps his legs around his waist, though he’s pretty damn close.

He stops pretending, which, initially, is hard. He finds himself and from that point on, it’s simpler than basketball and he hasn't thought that'd be possible. It is, though.

Because getting over Troy was hard, but falling in love with Ryan was the easiest thing he’s ever done.

 


End file.
